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28 Days – (Chapter: a heart that’s full of black.)
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She was huddled into herself, a small ball of misery. Spencer’s knees were drawn up to her chest and her head was dipped down. She made a small roll of depression. And despite all her efforts to the contrary, Ashley couldn’t not care. Clearly the blonde hadn’t heard her come up the stairs and into the room, because she hadn’t looked up. She was just hugging her knees and crying softly. The sound was like knives through the brunette.
“Spencer” she whispered. It should have been a lot angrier than it was.
Blonde tresses tossed back as Spencer’s head came up to meet Ashley. Her face was streaked with the remnants of tears and more were making their way down. There was a sadness in her eyes that made Ashley’s heart flip and her bottom lip was quivering in a way that made Ashley’s stomach quiver too.
Then Ashley remembered what she’d just done. And who she’d just done it with. And why she’d just done it. The anger came rushing back.
“What are you doing here?” It came out harsh, and in what Ashley considered a much more appropriate tone.
Spencer hiccoughed in response.
“Get out” Ashley sounded more defeated than anything. She held the door open wearily and pointed through it. “Out. I don’t want you here Spencer”
‘Liar, liar pants on fire. Should I call the fire brigade?’
“Please” Spencer’s whisper was low and hoarse, and it traveled all the way from Ashley’s head to her toes.
“Spencer, I …. I can’t do this. Please leave.” Ok, now they were both pleading.
‘You’re lying. You want her here. And you want to comfort her. Why do you always have to fight yourself so hard?’ Because dignity was worth something, wasn’t it?
“Please Ashley, I just… I need… I’m sorry” The tears were rolling down Spencer’s face so freely that Ashley wavered for a moment, and then broke. Closing her door with a sigh she walked over to the bed and knelt in front of it.
“I should hate you” she whispered, brushing Spencer’s hair off the blondes tear stricken face.
“I know” came the whispered reply. “You should.”
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woohoo! First to comment so this will have to be speedy – loved the update although thats now twice in a row you’ve had people hurling in your fic – not particularly pleasant but not too much of a deterrent so alls good! I keep finding myself craving more of your fics so please update this one again soon or the other one. I’ll give you presents with varying degrees of value….pretty please?!
bugger it, not first. I’ll just hope and pray for next time!
OH MY…wow..that was…beautiful. Spencer defines sheer desperation and i adore how even though Ashley is going through such intense emotional turmoil, she puts her needs aside for spencer. Love this fic sooo much, i can’t even express it in words
“DAMN YOU GOOD LOOKING CALIFORNIAN WENCH!! DAMN YOUI do own your soul now :D” I will take all of that as a compliment, Miss Sarah, lol.Yay for update!!!! Figured the current state of events, but very interested in how you will handle all of this. You are so great at twisting and expunging the various layers of complexity that live within what we do many times consider to be simplistic events/actions/emotions. Did that make sense? I just ate eggs…now I feel wierd. Thank you m’dear, and now I hope to see Ash and Spence gaining some backbone and assessing how important honesty is in any type of relationship. And yes, the words you gave Ash in response to spencer’s query were perfect: “A desperate one.” Yes, indeed, she is.you rock. But, I think you already knew that. xxo
Hmmm. I agree. Spencer and Ashley are definitely not right for each other….yet. Of course we all know they’re perfect for each other in the long run, but now? Holy Jesus, no. They need to reestablish the want and need and trust and comfort they once had in each other. And that may take a long time. Once again, poor Aiden. Dude’s getting the shitty end here.
ack. i think i may be sick myself. teenagers are already so screwed up, why do parents have to make it worse! (shoot me if i ever do that.) ashley did nail it with ‘desperate’. wonderful job of making spencer someone we can care about after her ‘mistake’ so to speak. i feel so badly for both of them. so much pain…
oh yeah – pegleg: if you somehow with your amazing powers made this update happen, you rock, because this update rocked. it was very palpable and beautiful, clom. pats on the back for all.
ok dont girls usually “whore” themselves aroud to piss their families off? i know i let them “think” i was whoring around to piss them off. lil did they know i was never really into them strapping little jerk faces. It was their sisters my mammy should have been worried about. ha ha too bad ashley doesnt have a brother.
damn this is great! I mean maybe before ashley comforts spencer anymore, she ought to go wash her hands. oh hell spence has got aidenators all over too so they ought both discuss their future it in the shower… After they brush their teeth! Ewe. stomache acid >_
thank you for this! incredible. especially for their first time staying with each other and trying to talk. i was so nervous when ashley started to freak out about spence’s dirty secret, but it’s not like she shouldn’t have expected it. the worst blow was when aiden said they were dating, and ash dealt with it… she’s such a strong character in this, i love her.
Holy FuDamn! That was so intense. I’m still reeling from the intensity. Yowza. You are freaking amazing. Update soon because even though Spencer and Ashley are sorta on speaking terms right now I need to know what happens. I need every exact detail, down to their last thought. Every single tiny thought. I swear, you are so stinking amazin’. Whoa…dude. My awe for you just like – tripled. Wow! Love.
woohoo! First to comment so this will have to be speedy – loved the update although thats now twice in a row you’ve had people hurling in your fic – not particularly pleasant but not too much of a deterrent so alls good! I keep finding myself craving more of your fics so please update this one again soon or the other one. I’ll give you presents with varying degrees of value….pretty please?!
bugger it, not first. I’ll just hope and pray for next time!
OH MY…wow..that was…beautiful. Spencer defines sheer desperation and i adore how even though Ashley is going through such intense emotional turmoil, she puts her needs aside for spencer. Love this fic sooo much, i can’t even express it in words
“DAMN YOU GOOD LOOKING CALIFORNIAN WENCH!! DAMN YOUI do own your soul now :D” I will take all of that as a compliment, Miss Sarah, lol.Yay for update!!!! Figured the current state of events, but very interested in how you will handle all of this. You are so great at twisting and expunging the various layers of complexity that live within what we do many times consider to be simplistic events/actions/emotions. Did that make sense? I just ate eggs…now I feel wierd. Thank you m’dear, and now I hope to see Ash and Spence gaining some backbone and assessing how important honesty is in any type of relationship. And yes, the words you gave Ash in response to spencer’s query were perfect: “A desperate one.” Yes, indeed, she is.you rock. But, I think you already knew that. xxo
Hmmm. I agree. Spencer and Ashley are definitely not right for each other….yet. Of course we all know they’re perfect for each other in the long run, but now? Holy Jesus, no. They need to reestablish the want and need and trust and comfort they once had in each other. And that may take a long time. Once again, poor Aiden. Dude’s getting the shitty end here.
ack. i think i may be sick myself. teenagers are already so screwed up, why do parents have to make it worse! (shoot me if i ever do that.) ashley did nail it with ‘desperate’. wonderful job of making spencer someone we can care about after her ‘mistake’ so to speak. i feel so badly for both of them. so much pain…
oh yeah – pegleg: if you somehow with your amazing powers made this update happen, you rock, because this update rocked. it was very palpable and beautiful, clom. pats on the back for all.
ok dont girls usually “whore” themselves aroud to piss their families off? i know i let them “think” i was whoring around to piss them off. lil did they know i was never really into them strapping little jerk faces. It was their sisters my mammy should have been worried about. ha ha too bad ashley doesnt have a brother.
damn this is great! I mean maybe before ashley comforts spencer anymore, she ought to go wash her hands. oh hell spence has got aidenators all over too so they ought both discuss their future it in the shower… After they brush their teeth! Ewe. stomache acid >_
thank you for this! incredible. especially for their first time staying with each other and trying to talk. i was so nervous when ashley started to freak out about spence’s dirty secret, but it’s not like she shouldn’t have expected it. the worst blow was when aiden said they were dating, and ash dealt with it… she’s such a strong character in this, i love her.
Holy FuDamn! That was so intense. I’m still reeling from the intensity. Yowza. You are freaking amazing. Update soon because even though Spencer and Ashley are sorta on speaking terms right now I need to know what happens. I need every exact detail, down to their last thought. Every single tiny thought. I swear, you are so stinking amazin’. Whoa…dude. My awe for you just like – tripled. Wow! Love.
Wow poor spencer and ashley! i hope they can figue things out! Update soon!
more now Clom, you know the drill ;-) Loving it, and like how Ash seems to have found her brain again – she got over the alcohol very quickly! Spencer needs to get over herself, I mean gees, she’s gay, it’s not like it’s the end of the world – if she loved Ash that much she wouldn’t care about her parents, and she certainly wouldn’t have slept with Aiden… idiot! ah well, I would shake her and slap her upside the head to try to make her see sense, but seeing as I don’t hit people, and this Spencer has no actual touchable form, I’ll just make do with cajoling you into writing more damn soon ;-) love! Jx
Wow poor spencer and ashley! i hope they can figue things out! Update soon!
more now Clom, you know the drill ;-) Loving it, and like how Ash seems to have found her brain again – she got over the alcohol very quickly! Spencer needs to get over herself, I mean gees, she’s gay, it’s not like it’s the end of the world – if she loved Ash that much she wouldn’t care about her parents, and she certainly wouldn’t have slept with Aiden… idiot! ah well, I would shake her and slap her upside the head to try to make her see sense, but seeing as I don’t hit people, and this Spencer has no actual touchable form, I’ll just make do with cajoling you into writing more damn soon ;-) love! Jx
oh my freakin god!! that was a heaven sent update! ash is such a wuss when it comes to spencer. ;) but we wouldnt want it any other way do we? i agree with goober, they are so not right for each other now. ash has to be the friend now, not lover. and help spence figure out her life before it gets worse. I LUG YOU SO MUCH for this update!!!!
oh my freakin god!! that was a heaven sent update! ash is such a wuss when it comes to spencer. ;) but we wouldnt want it any other way do we? i agree with goober, they are so not right for each other now. ash has to be the friend now, not lover. and help spence figure out her life before it gets worse. I LUG YOU SO MUCH for this update!!!!
Yeah Spencer you’re a whore but, we still love you. They’re not right for each other right now but, I want them together. Poor Spencer for just lying there and “taking it” with Aiden. Oh gosh! Poor Aiden! Throwing up is the side affect after sleeping with him. I mean, its one thing when someone regrets having sex with you but, its another when they puke after having sex with you. His ego is going to take a beating.
Yeah Spencer you’re a whore but, we still love you. They’re not right for each other right now but, I want them together. Poor Spencer for just lying there and “taking it” with Aiden. Oh gosh! Poor Aiden! Throwing up is the side affect after sleeping with him. I mean, its one thing when someone regrets having sex with you but, its another when they puke after having sex with you. His ego is going to take a beating.