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Growing Up – (Chapter: Letting Go)
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“Make love to me.”
Her words send a shiver down my spine and a sharp breath escapes from my lungs in a husky gasp. Every muscle begins to tingle and burn with anticipation. The heat radiating from her body seems to be absorbing into mine, threatening to ignite a fire between us. Clouded with passion, my immediate answer should not include words, but a silent execution of her request. Instead, I search for clarification I know I do not need.
“What about Jesse?” I mumble out trying desperately to adjust my voice to sound normal, but it breaks on every word.
“There’s no one else in the world tonight. Just you and me.” I envy her confidence and ability to form sentences with ease.
“I’m not sure I can lose you again.” I confess as a tear makes its way down my face and rests on my neck.
“You’ll never lose me. I’ll always be with you in some way.” Her gentle reassurance dampens my heart; it tells me this will not bring us together permanently. She will not leave Jessica and the life she has in New Jersey. As agonizing as it is to know this, that regardless of my actions tonight, her leaving is inevitable, I understand the consequences. To go through with this means putting my heart on the line knowing with complete certainty that it will be broken.
“I love you.” Sometimes it is in experiencing the pain of heartbreak that growing as a person becomes possible. Allowing myself to love and lose Spencer will help me take that step towards becoming a more complete being. After all the running away I have done in fear of getting hurt, this time I run to her, knowing I will be.
“I love you too.” Her breath intensifies on my face as she gets closer and closer, inching one centimeter at a time until I feel the ghostly presence of her lips on mine.
Her lips part as mine do and I feel the cool pull of breath from her mouth just before she gently captures my top lip and releases it immediately in a feathery kiss. Sliding my hand from her cheek to the back of her neck, I pull her closer, allowing our mouths to cradle each others in a tender embrace. Her tongue meets mine in a perfectly choreographed dance of love and passion. She moans softly into the delicately slow kiss and brings her hand to my cheek, attempting as I had done earlier, to pull closer.
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damn that was sooo good..but it was like sweet in a kind of way..yea spencer needs to drop jessie and just be with ashley already…i sence drama comming along in the next chapters…yea even tho it was needed ashely shouldnt have had sex with spencer unless she said her and jessie were over..cuz ash is just gon end up gettin hurt again…alright well i love this story.. i check like everyday if there is a new post of it..sometimes u dont post 4eva and it be killin me..lol try n post sooner..wel im lovin ther story..keep it up..byee
Wow!…That was awesome. Took them long enough to get there. Now i can’t wait to how they will act around each other now. Reality, Spencer just cheated on Jessie. oh bad girl. lol. well im glad it was with Ashley. Post more when you can.
Thanks for making it a happy ending, I was hoping for one. And it was fantastic. I just wish Ashley and Spencer could be together. Maybe after college when they aren’t thousands of miles apart. And perhaps until then they are wonderful friends? *nudge nudge, wink wink* Just a suggestion.
OMG that has to be the most amazing chapter I every read. I loved it sooo much. keep up the great work. ; )
You did not disappoint. Wow. Bittersweet yes, but still beautiful. I think another reviewer mentioned this but I’ll add it in again: “After all the running away I have done in fear of getting hurt, this time I run to her, knowing I will be.” That line really hit me – it was absolutely perfect. Thanks for this!
Like others said, definitely bittersweet. I really enjoyed this chapter and you did not disappoint at all. It was beautifully written. Ash went into this knowing she could get hurt because of Spencer not saying she broke anything off with Jessie, but here’s hoping that Ash’s idea that this will bring the two of them closer with their friendship is not wrong. Hopefully this doesn’t somehow bring an awkwardness and more distance (for some reason). Anyways, can’t wait till you get back in, what, two weeks? Here’s to more happy chapters!!!
Wow…I really don’t know what else to say. Well actually I do…I am a little pissed that you will be gone for two whole weeks!! And….Spencer just cheated on Jess!! I mean I would have it be with no other than Ashley, but Spencer just cheated on her girlfriend! I can’t wait till you come back!!!
wow that was pure genious. you are truely a master in the art of Spencer and Ashley. although in this story, under the circumstances you’ve provided, it seems they will never be together. possibly keeping them as friends is the best root of action? even though we all want a beautiful spashley life, is that really what this story is leading to? well i guess in 2 weeks we’ll find out!
really really good. I’m a little confused, what’s keeping these two apart exactly! I be screw it your who I want and love, lets go! thats of course just me. love the story. it was more sad then anything to me.
Aww that was so sad yet wonderful. Loved it.
I also concur that you did not disappoint…”You’ll never lose me. I’ll always be with you in some way.” …AWESOME!!!!
Wow that was an amazing chapter. You totally rock. I also feel that it was bittersweet, more of a goodbye, I hope that I’m wrong. These two just belong together. Thank You for this chapter and have an amazing trip! We’ll all be waiting for you when you get back! :)
Goodness gracious…so frickin’ HOTT!! ::whew:: I think I need a cold shower…yup, yes I do…hehe.
Whoa, time to read that again! It’s almost unfortunate that this chapter is only one page long, but DEE-YAMM, THAT WAS SIZZLIN’!! Another stellar post from you, Case, just keep it coming eh. I agree with the general consensus, I love the line about Ashley knowing she will be hurt. I’m undecided whether this is supposed to be the sunshine after the rain OR the calm before the storm (mweh!). Whatever it is, for the love of Nowhere-Ohio, please PLEASE give Spashley enough strength to go through it! (…and give Jesse the boot already :o)
YAAAAAAAAAY!!! hahaahaha Ash and Spence are finally realizing how much they truly love each other…now all we have to do is to get spence to dump that piece of crap gf jessica and move back to LA…but then again i kno that theres no way things are going to be so drama free…hell no..not with you writing this shit…but hey i cant complain right??…post more soon!…please im begging you…please lmao
Yay for the Spashley lovin, but I don’t think Ash should have did it. Having sex with the person you are in love with, but can’t have does not help you let go. This is gonna be detrimental to Ash afterwards. Spencer is still with Jess, she is still gonna go back to the east. All this did was tease Ash, she got a taste, now she is gonna know what she is missing and crave it. I don’t think this was a good idea. And I feel it was wrong of Spencer to ask her to make love to her, it was so unfair. Plus, Spencer has a girlfriend, that is not Ashley, even if I don’t like her, she is still Spencer’s girlfriend. I know what it is like to be in a relationship like Ash and Spencer. Their friendship was never platonic, and it never will be. I think they just further complicated their situation. Hope you update soon
that was a great chapter girl… I’m really glad you made it a happy one. I just hope that they will find a way to stay together cause that’s what we’ve all been waiting for… So please find some kind of solution for them cause they are meant to be together and they cannot go on being unhappy like this… Please please pretty please!?!
That’s one of the most beautiful things I’ve ever read. And I’ve read a lot of stuff. Thanks so much for getting them back together. I really hope they can work things out!
I just died. That’s all.
that was really good, spencer needs to get of jessie and be with ash already…….. post as soon as possible.
Ok so I’m more than positive that it has been two weeks!! You have to be back from Portugal already!! Where are you?!?! We need your story here…well at least I do.
Well, I started reading this fic yesterday, and i read all day and i finished it late last night. I just wanted to say…wow. I have been in a bit of a dryspell as far as reading fiction that i really enjoy, but i am completely hooked and cannot wait to see where this goes next. thank you for writing. i really enjoyed reading and am eagerly awaiting the next installment.
damn that was sooo good..but it was like sweet in a kind of way..yea spencer needs to drop jessie and just be with ashley already…i sence drama comming along in the next chapters…yea even tho it was needed ashely shouldnt have had sex with spencer unless she said her and jessie were over..cuz ash is just gon end up gettin hurt again…alright well i love this story.. i check like everyday if there is a new post of it..sometimes u dont post 4eva and it be killin me..lol try n post sooner..wel im lovin ther story..keep it up..byee
Wow!…That was awesome. Took them long enough to get there. Now i can’t wait to how they will act around each other now. Reality, Spencer just cheated on Jessie. oh bad girl. lol. well im glad it was with Ashley. Post more when you can.
Thanks for making it a happy ending, I was hoping for one. And it was fantastic. I just wish Ashley and Spencer could be together. Maybe after college when they aren’t thousands of miles apart. And perhaps until then they are wonderful friends? *nudge nudge, wink wink* Just a suggestion.
OMG that has to be the most amazing chapter I every read. I loved it sooo much. keep up the great work. ; )
You did not disappoint. Wow. Bittersweet yes, but still beautiful. I think another reviewer mentioned this but I’ll add it in again: “After all the running away I have done in fear of getting hurt, this time I run to her, knowing I will be.” That line really hit me – it was absolutely perfect. Thanks for this!
Like others said, definitely bittersweet. I really enjoyed this chapter and you did not disappoint at all. It was beautifully written. Ash went into this knowing she could get hurt because of Spencer not saying she broke anything off with Jessie, but here’s hoping that Ash’s idea that this will bring the two of them closer with their friendship is not wrong. Hopefully this doesn’t somehow bring an awkwardness and more distance (for some reason). Anyways, can’t wait till you get back in, what, two weeks? Here’s to more happy chapters!!!
Wow…I really don’t know what else to say. Well actually I do…I am a little pissed that you will be gone for two whole weeks!! And….Spencer just cheated on Jess!! I mean I would have it be with no other than Ashley, but Spencer just cheated on her girlfriend! I can’t wait till you come back!!!
wow that was pure genious. you are truely a master in the art of Spencer and Ashley. although in this story, under the circumstances you’ve provided, it seems they will never be together. possibly keeping them as friends is the best root of action? even though we all want a beautiful spashley life, is that really what this story is leading to? well i guess in 2 weeks we’ll find out!
really really good. I’m a little confused, what’s keeping these two apart exactly! I be screw it your who I want and love, lets go! thats of course just me. love the story. it was more sad then anything to me.
Aww that was so sad yet wonderful. Loved it.
I also concur that you did not disappoint…”You’ll never lose me. I’ll always be with you in some way.” …AWESOME!!!!
Wow that was an amazing chapter. You totally rock. I also feel that it was bittersweet, more of a goodbye, I hope that I’m wrong. These two just belong together. Thank You for this chapter and have an amazing trip! We’ll all be waiting for you when you get back! :)
Goodness gracious…so frickin’ HOTT!! ::whew:: I think I need a cold shower…yup, yes I do…hehe.
Whoa, time to read that again! It’s almost unfortunate that this chapter is only one page long, but DEE-YAMM, THAT WAS SIZZLIN’!! Another stellar post from you, Case, just keep it coming eh. I agree with the general consensus, I love the line about Ashley knowing she will be hurt. I’m undecided whether this is supposed to be the sunshine after the rain OR the calm before the storm (mweh!). Whatever it is, for the love of Nowhere-Ohio, please PLEASE give Spashley enough strength to go through it! (…and give Jesse the boot already :o)
YAAAAAAAAAY!!! hahaahaha Ash and Spence are finally realizing how much they truly love each other…now all we have to do is to get spence to dump that piece of crap gf jessica and move back to LA…but then again i kno that theres no way things are going to be so drama free…hell no..not with you writing this shit…but hey i cant complain right??…post more soon!…please im begging you…please lmao
Yay for the Spashley lovin, but I don’t think Ash should have did it. Having sex with the person you are in love with, but can’t have does not help you let go. This is gonna be detrimental to Ash afterwards. Spencer is still with Jess, she is still gonna go back to the east. All this did was tease Ash, she got a taste, now she is gonna know what she is missing and crave it. I don’t think this was a good idea. And I feel it was wrong of Spencer to ask her to make love to her, it was so unfair. Plus, Spencer has a girlfriend, that is not Ashley, even if I don’t like her, she is still Spencer’s girlfriend. I know what it is like to be in a relationship like Ash and Spencer. Their friendship was never platonic, and it never will be. I think they just further complicated their situation. Hope you update soon
that was a great chapter girl… I’m really glad you made it a happy one. I just hope that they will find a way to stay together cause that’s what we’ve all been waiting for… So please find some kind of solution for them cause they are meant to be together and they cannot go on being unhappy like this… Please please pretty please!?!
That’s one of the most beautiful things I’ve ever read. And I’ve read a lot of stuff. Thanks so much for getting them back together. I really hope they can work things out!
I just died. That’s all.
that was really good, spencer needs to get of jessie and be with ash already…….. post as soon as possible.
Ok so I’m more than positive that it has been two weeks!! You have to be back from Portugal already!! Where are you?!?! We need your story here…well at least I do.
Well, I started reading this fic yesterday, and i read all day and i finished it late last night. I just wanted to say…wow. I have been in a bit of a dryspell as far as reading fiction that i really enjoy, but i am completely hooked and cannot wait to see where this goes next. thank you for writing. i really enjoyed reading and am eagerly awaiting the next installment.
OH, and have fun in Portugal! Don’t let the FBI find you! (Why did you choose Portugal? You should have chosen Crete. The FBI would never think to look there!)
OH, and have fun in Portugal! Don’t let the FBI find you! (Why did you choose Portugal? You should have chosen Crete. The FBI would never think to look there!)
I think I need a bumper sticker that says “I’m nuts 4 caseygurl”. You made me nuts with all of the torture (i.e. cliffhangers, giving Spence and Ash different girlfriends, etc). All of the torture was worth it, though, since it led to this chapter. This chapter was VERY well done :) Just like everyone else one this site, I’m starting to get suspicious of why Spencer finally let herself be with Ashley. Something must be have happened with Spencer, or something must be getting ready to happen that is going to change their entire relationship. Whatever you’re going to put Spencer and Ashley through next, I’m ready for it! Torture me, baby!
I think I need a bumper sticker that says “I’m nuts 4 caseygurl”. You made me nuts with all of the torture (i.e. cliffhangers, giving Spence and Ash different girlfriends, etc). All of the torture was worth it, though, since it led to this chapter. This chapter was VERY well done :) Just like everyone else one this site, I’m starting to get suspicious of why Spencer finally let herself be with Ashley. Something must be have happened with Spencer, or something must be getting ready to happen that is going to change their entire relationship. Whatever you’re going to put Spencer and Ashley through next, I’m ready for it! Torture me, baby!
please please please please please please update soon i honestly love this fic ..it seems to just get better and better with each chapter..please pms..
please please please please please please update soon i honestly love this fic ..it seems to just get better and better with each chapter..please pms..
haha i agree with Jordan on that one..it has been well over two weeks..and im dieing here waitin to dee wut happens next….
haha i agree with Jordan on that one..it has been well over two weeks..and im dieing here waitin to dee wut happens next….
ok i think the two weeks of your vacation are up, and you need to get writing, please? i really want to see what happens next
ok i think the two weeks of your vacation are up, and you need to get writing, please? i really want to see what happens next