Carmen’s POV

She gave me a gun; she was dead serious when I looked at her after she placed it next to my laptop. I was shaking as I first held it.

I hid near where all the CD’s are stacked. I had no idea where else to put it; one thing I knew I didn’t want it to be in my room. I knew she probably had a gun with her; it still freaks me out that she actually does has a gun or guns. I was curious to see what does she have in her room; and it got the best of me as I stepped inside her darken room.

Everything was neat; she has shoes that I’ve never seen her wear before. I opened her closet and saw the neatly hanged suits; stripes. No-stripes; dark grey; grey and etcetera. To think about the tag prices on these tailored suits would be ridiculous.

Then a large case got my attention; the shape was almost like a drawer and it opens like a drawer; I had an inkling what’s going to be in it and I was right. There could be at least six or more guns in there. I gasped as I laid my eyes on it; everything was properly ordered; the tip of the gun was pointing all at the same direction; to the wall. I scanned from left to right; the sight of the weapons sends me a cold shiver down my back. I shut it close immediately.

I wanted to cry; I wanted to run; I wanted to scream; I wanted to not feel anything. Suddenly I didn’t want to feel… this love; this intense passion we have for each other…  anything. I wanted to run away from the obvious; I’m having doubts about all of this; about us. But I can’t do that; what ever it is… I can’t do that to her or to my self… because well; I’ll just be living a lie. And who I am kidding… I can never let go of her.

I couldn’t sit still after that; knowing that she is off somewhere in the roughest part of East L.A.